Tagged: New Year’s Resolutions

Back in the Saddle Again

Hey, whoa! It’s me! Writing a blog post! This is kind of surprising, because things got weird there for a while and I disappeared.


Kind of like this! …Kind of.

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Getting Better all the Time

What did you guys get for Christmas? I got food poisoning!*

And while some people (my grandma, mostly) pitied me for spending the holiday alone and sick on a couch 300 miles from my hometown, I actually had a pretty good time. And not just because I don’t like Christmas.

I mean, some parts kind of sucked. The nausea was not great. I think Hell might be a pantry full of junk food that you really want to eat but can’t because your stomach is on strike. But mostly I was happy. I made a tree out of books! I listened to Pandora’s Christmas radio station for nearly a full minute! I watched Ike try to eat snowflakes through the windowpane!


I dropped him once when he was a baby. He landed on his feet, of course, but I still wonder if these things are my fault.

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I Hate You, Nicolas Cage: My New Year’s Resolutions

Nicolas Cage at a panel for Kick-Ass a WonderC...

This is not hair. This is… this is icky.

Every year, I forget to make resolutions for the new year until around February. This year, I vowed to keep on top of them, so I started making them in October and writing them down on small pieces of paper that I promptly lost. I keep finding scraps of paper in the pockets of my jackets and the lint trap with ridiculous things written on them, but I think I’ve managed to collect most of the important ones. So here’s to 2010, a year in which I answered the door for the police with no pants on, watched a U.S. Congressman who will not be named crawl around on the floor with a wiener dog, and made probably the funniest joke I’ve ever made (I can’t repeat it. It was just so good and perfectly timed that I don’t want to tarnish it.), among other things. Bring it on, 2011.

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