Tagged: High school

How to Be Alone on Prom Night

It’s April, which means it’s prom season again, and that means all of the sudden everyone wants to talk about high school.

We all know at least one person who is still hung up on high school. Talking to them is like listening to Springsteen’s “Glory Days” while watching a montage of John Hughes movie shenanigans. These are weird people, and those of us who spent high school writing resentful lists in our friend’s boyfriend’s old notebooks will go out of our way to avoid them.

I’m correct in assuming we all had one of these, right?

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Observations Made By My Little Brother After Attending His First High School Homecoming Dance, and My Other Brother’s Last, A Surprising Number of Which Are Related to Bigfoot

Frame 352 from the film, alleged to depict a f...

A picture of my brother, Drew.

– I like homecoming.

– Shut up, she was not my date. We’re just friends.

– I think I like homecoming.

– Did you see how Drew and I dressed opposite of each other? His tie was gray and my shirt was, and my tie was black and his shirt was. Man, it was so itchy. But that’s weird, right?

– I like homecoming, and I ate a vanilla wafer!

– I saw Drew dancing. He pretended he wasn’t having fun, but I saw him dancing. He dances like this: (demonstration of stomping and twitching). Like Bigfoot! Exactly how Bigfoot would dance!

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